I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
