I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
