So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
