I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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