I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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