It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
You're like the curious george of whores
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Randomize
