that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize
