I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Randomize