I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
