Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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