Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
