she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
