I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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