it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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