Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
