I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
