How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
