somebody snuck up and got me drunk
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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