what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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