we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
