So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize