No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize