Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
