Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Randomize
