He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I will be naked everywhere
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
