I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
