when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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