I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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