OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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