id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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