We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
