official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize