Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
