Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
