U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I accidentally burped into my bong.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
