He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
