Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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