How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Randomize
