just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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