At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
