This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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