So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
