And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Randomize
