when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
