i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
