I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
