HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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