She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Randomize
