My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
