it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
