so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize